Express to harmonize with world and its fear

I want to share with more people, to everybody and randomly. It's good feeling sharing with my friends but that's not enough. I need to be more exposed, not to get attention but to express. The reason why I express is fundementally to live, exist in harmony with others. There can be fight against somebody either by being attacked or I attack other. I can be ignored and unanswered. All those disharmony can highly occured. But It's merely manifestation of where I'm at and where others or particular group at. It should be recieved as it is. Of course my ideal wish is to be harmonized. Why? I think it is every human beings core desire. I'm no exception to it. I really feel that desire. And there is also temtation of challenge. I also aware I can failed to harmonize with people in contemporary society. Thgen I have to accept that unacceptance. Then I probably have to figure out how to live completely in solitude. That's easy to write but scary thought indeed. That's why there were people go insane or become destructive and violance such as mass murderer. All the guys I've met who have been lonly and isolated have experienced fear, anger and revengeous thought. We feel this unbalance, disharmony, unfairness, unjustice because we have sense of balance, harmony, fairness, and justice. That's not some kind of ultimate virtue for all human beings. It's also mere idea that we compelled. I don't know whether we born with those disposition or it's out come of our up bringing. But it's patterned among us. Maybe it's breakable pattern but is it something I ought to trenscend? I don't have answer yet but I want to think back about the challenge I was thinking. Because I feel the fear of fail to harmonize, united with world I strongly compell to do it as a challenge I must do in my life in this moment. I was fascinated by those YouTube community people. It was strong stimulus and pleasant shock. And desire to be able to interact as they do in my way started since then.